Friends and family of groom Neil Lighton, 27, were left disappointed on Saturday after his best man’s speech failed to mention the hilarious time Lighton accidentally ran over and killed a 67-year old woman
Describing the incident as ‘classic Neil’, guests couldn’t believe its omission from the speech given by Lighton’s best friend, Alexander Horne. “He completely missed the obvious gag,” one commented. “All the best man had to do was take a swipe at the time Neil was driving a bit too fast while changing radio stations and stupidly annihilated a pensioner’s life with his front bumper, like the total klutz he is! The crowd would have been in stitches.”
“I was there, so I know how funny it was,” school friend Adam Warner continued. “It was really funny. Tim had only recently passed his test and he was all like ‘Oh God what have I done?’, and ‘I’ll never be able to unsee this’ – amazing! And to top it off he panicked and drove off before the police arrived, so it was a hit-and-run! I mean, how much more ‘Neil’ can you get?”
The crowd were instead treated to heart-warming jokes about Lighton’s bride changing his life for the better, putting his life back on track, and wishing them a long and happy life together. “Literally the dullest speech I’ve ever heard,” said Warner.